A new record

14 inches of snow fell in OKC today. A new record with the most snow ever falling at one time. We got to experience a blizzard our first winter in OKC. Conner and I played outside today in the cold, bitter wind but it was so very worth it. We were supposed to leave in the a.m. for Florida but currently the interstates are all closed. We are hoping the wind will let up tonight b/c the drifting is what is making this so much worse. It was much easier making these decisions before having children. We wouldn't have thought twice but not anymore - too much at stake! That being said, I wouldn't change a thing. It was the perfect weather for a perfect day. Merry Christmas everyone!!!!

I believe in Santa Claus

It's snowing. In Oklahoma. On Christmas Eve folks. I want nothing else. The blinds are all pulled up and we are enjoying the winter wonderland. Merry Christmas!!!!!!

2 years ago today...

We saw Biruk's beautiful face for the first time. I was 3 months pregnant at the time and we had changed our preference from 0-12 months to 6-12 months old. Yet when I got the call, Alexa had said, "I know you had requested a 6-12 month old, but would you be open to a younger child" (I can still hear her voice in my head, my whole body shaking with nerves) and I responded "yes, yes, of course we're open". And then I got all the details on our sweet baby boy. So many emotions crossed our minds over those next few days. Two children, only 8-9 months apart. How would we manage? And all I could keep coming back to was that we still received a referral for younger than what we had requested. We were meant to be together. And I found comfort in that. We were chosen, blessed and fortunate enough to be able to stare into these beautiful eyes for the rest of our life. Thankful to see his smile, hear him laugh, talk and see his first step. And so grateful and honored to guide him along the path of life. We love you Biruk, thank you for blessing us with more than we could have ever imagined.

My gift to you...

I liked life in Missouri. I always knew it wasn't "forever" but life was good. I had fears that the perhaps the grass wasn't always greener and that my desires to live somewhere more fulfilling would bite me in the butt. That maybe it was as good as it was going to get in our small little town. Nathan worked from home with some day traveling (still does) and when around, we could give him hugs and kisses during the day, especially when we really needed it. And every so often we had breakfast together during the week, sometimes we would get him for lunch and almost every single night he was home for dinner. That in itself is a lot to be grateful for. And of course there are the 3 precious boys that we get to call ours. 3 healthy, happy, loving, generous, beautiful boys. It hasn't always been easy, but never have I regretted the choices we have made. Our life experiences have only made us stronger, closer and more grateful for what we have been given, what we have earned and what we have stumbled upon. In the 10 years I've been with Nathan my love for him has only grown stronger. I remember daydreaming in college about what kind of father and husband he would be. It doesn't hold a candle to the real thing. He has more patience, more generosity and more kindness than I had thought possible. And he's mine, I'm his, and for that I will always be grateful.

Fast forward to Oklahoma. We moved after our home sold and closed within 2 weeks. We were fortunate enough to find a rental in the suburb we didn't even think we were interested in living in. We LOVE it! After a month or two of craziness, boxes everywhere, nothing to be found, we started to get settled. With the chaos came a driveway that is perfect for riding bikes, a trail system we had always dreamed of, and weather that puts a smile on your face when you look out the window. In the two months living here we've spent more time outdoors and have put more miles on our bikes than in the past year living in Missouri. And the time we have spent relaxing with the kids and enjoying our time together is a result of this rental property. There are no rooms to paint, no drywall to patch, no plumbing to repair. We don't worry about all the flaws, the peeling drywall, the tub that doesn't drain or the mold near the patio window. It's not our problem. If renting a home has taught me anything, it's to slow down. And I couldn't be more thankful. We needed a big dose of that after moving 5 times (soon to be 6) in six years. We needed it after completely gutting and remodeling an old home with a one year old. And we really needed it after having 3 children in 32 months. I was scared of what one might consider a "boring life" after the whirlwind we had just lived through. But little did I know how much I would love it.

So my gift to you is this,
"Slow down. Enjoy the moment. Stop and read a book. Worry about your dirty house later (the dishes will still be there waiting). Go play outside with your kids. Celebrate the Christmas season for what it really is (not the version of what society thinks it is). Hug your loved ones as often as you can. You won't regret it. I promise. And take chances. You never know where it may lead you. I hope to carry this attitude through 2010. And I hope for all of you, you find your groove. You are able to slow down and enjoy the simple things in life. It's all of these little moments that shape us into who we are. Embrace them. Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!!"

Chandra :)
p.s. Christmas cards may be a little late this year (I've taken this "slowing down" mentality very seriously). And I can not find my address book in the mess of boxes, please email addresses! Thanks for your understanding.

Such a happy time of year...

I've been tagged to do a blogpost on what makes me happy and the only rule is to be specific. So here goes.

- Christmas lights. We went out driving again last night and it was so much fun. I loved it as a child and I still feel as happy today. And hearing the kids' excitement makes it all the better.
- Warm muffins. Specifically the coffee cake one I'm eating right now.
- Statler Brothers Christmas music.
- Laughing in bed late at night with Nater.
- Snowboarding.
- Exercising (I dread it before, always happy after).
- Food. I have a sick appreciation for all delicious food!
- Charity water (specifically water4christmas).
- AHOPE (and other wonderful charity's taking care of other people).
- When I see little babies.
- Family vacations.
- My siblings and I gathered in my parents kitchen laughing together.
- Camping.
- Laughter (I can't not smile when I hear someone laughing).
- My children laughing.
- Warm cookies, fresh out of the oven.
- Lake Michigan (and all of my memories of camping up there).
- Nathan doing his monkey routine (I had the pleasure of this last night). I say monkey but it's actually more like an ape.
- The Twilight series. I have to say it if I really want to be honest here. I'm rereading them right now and I find myself smiling as I'm reading the book. Totally dorky and cheesy but it's the truth. And I'm all about honesty.
- My extended family. I am very fortunate to have come from a very large extended family that we are very close with.
- Snow and watching it fall down in big flakes. I even like shoveling it. I am missing it terribly right now.
- Cherry coke.
- Candy.
- Nature (trees, being outdoors, sitting in the sun).
- Bike rides.
- Nater's humor (those that know him will understand this one).
- Nathan's smile.
- Watching Nathan as a dad.
- Watching movies, curled up on the sofa with a blanket, eating popcorn.
- The smell of Christmas trees (I just caught the scent).
- A glass of wine (or beer).
- Campfires.
- Ou annual Labor Day camping trip with my mom's side of the family (25th year in 2010).
- Good days with the boys.
- And most importanly, my little family of five!

I'm just sitting here imagining what makes me happy and things just continue to pop into my head. I think I could go on and on (and on). So I'll stop now before you have to read anymore. It's just that time of year I guess for enjoying the small things in life. And I'm loving living in a rental home. We have nothing that "needs" to be done around the house. We spend our weekends relaxing on the sofa, hanging out with the boys and trying to come up with something to do. I think I could get used to this slow lifestyle. Soon we'll be owning another home and I hope we can continue this way of life and thinking after we move into our next house.

I'll leave you with some pictures of my 3 little eskimos. I had bought these 3 little vest on clearance last year when daydreaming about living somewhere cold with lots of snow. I busted them out yesterday and the kids have been wearing them ever since. We snapped these photo's last night just before heading out to look at christmas lights. They have their jammies on underneath so try to ignore the terrible color coordinating on my part.
Happy Holidays!

The big boy

Where the wild things are...

Motherhood. I've been at it for 4 years now and feel about as confident as I did the day Conner was born (if not, less confident). There are still so many days that I am at a loss as to why Landon is crying, why Biruk is throwing a tantrum, or why Conner has his arms by his side with his little fingers into a tight fist. I'm not naturally a patient person. It takes a ton of effort on my part to not freak out on the kids when they are all going crazy (or should I say making me crazy). Today was one of those tough days. Maybe I woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I felt like it was a struggle all day to keep it together. It took me 40 minutes at dinner time to get Biruk calmed down enough to eat. I rocked him, I sang to him, I spoke nicely but it didn't matter. I have no idea what was wrong and he sure as hell wanted nothing to do with me. Nathan is traveling and I'm guessing that is some of it. He's still covering his old territory through the end of the year and thankfully, 2010 will hopefully provide us with Nathan again in the evenings (most of the time). We don't do well when dad is away. Anyway, so things calmed down but I just couldn't get everything that had happened out of my head. I've decided that this is definitely the most trying job I've ever had. All of my jobs have had their own challenges; babysitting bratty kids, smelling ammonia all day while making blue prints and sorting through caramels on a conveyor belt. And I've had a few cake jobs as well. But being a mother is definitely the one that has pushed me to the max time and time again. I suppose that is what makes the good days, so damn good.

As the night was coming to an end I kept my promise to the kids of looking at Christmas lights. As I loaded them, cranked on the heat and pulled out of the drive I knew things were about to change. Excitement filled the van and everyone was super excited. Landon kept squealing "lights, lights" with each house we passed that was decorated followed by a sweet little giggle. How can you not smile at that? Conner has gotten so good at spotting all of the homes with lights, no matter how far away they are. And of course he told me stories of previous winters when we looked at lights or when he played in the snow with dad (for those of you who don't know this kid has an incredible memory). And Biruk did what he always does in the car - wrapped his arms around buddy, put his finger in his mouth and grinned every time I looked back at him. At one point I looked back to Biruk and Conner holding hands. Now, how in the world, could I have been so angry today? So incredibly frustrated that I wanted to sit in a closet and cry. In four more years I'll probably be asking myself the same thing. I suppose that is why they say to take it a day at a time. And it seems so silly now. After they are all asleep, cuddled and read to, their teeth brushed. What was I so angry about? And not to mention how stupid it seems when I think of people with REAL problems; unemployment, hunger, thirst, abuse, chronic illnesses.

Tomorrow is another day. Dad will be home by bedtime and the next day starts the weekend. I made it through my second day without any sweets (today was much easier than yesterday) and I worked out for the third time this week. I am sitting by the Christmas tree, enjoying the lights and hoping for more patience, love and kindness with my boys tomorrow. Wish me luck. Oh and please don't imagine me as the monster I make myself out to be :)

Tuesday's thoughts...

Today feels like a Monday. It's not, but it feels like one. I am surrounded by mounds of laundry, the kids are still a little off from the holiday weekend, the dishes need unloaded from the dishwasher, the house needs dusted and swept and there are still some groceries that need put away from last night. The Christmas cards are waiting to be started and I still need to order a photo or two to slip in the cards. We leave for Florida in less than 4 weeks so I'd like to find a portable DVD player for our 2600 mile round trip (any suggestions). And I haven't picked up any Christmas presents yet. Not that it's really a big deal because we give very few gifts. Last year each of the boys got a sword from us. That's it. A $10 sword. And this year we still plan on keeping it small. I'd like them to be something they can take on the car ride since we are leaving Christmas day. Again, any suggestions? Maybe some new books or a toy. But they get so bored with toys in such a short time.

And the other challenge that faces me this month is losing a few pounds. I managed to gain about 8 lbs since September so I'm kicking it into high gear this month to see if I can shed a few of those pounds. I told myself for the next 3 weeks I need to work out 5 x's a week. No pop, beer or eating out. Also, NO sweets. We'll see if I can stay true to that. There will be a couple exceptions of course, including when we go to KC for hubby's work party we'll eat out and their is a cookie exchange with my moms group and I will definitely partake in that. But whatever the case, it will be better than my current candy intake (a box of dots in one sitting Friday night, followed by a box of mike n ikes Sat night and a little more here and there). Something else I'd like to improve on is reading the labels. There are a few things in our pantry that I know need to go but I've been cooking with them for so long. Slowly but surely we'll get there.

The sun is shining and the sky is beautiful. Hope you are all having a great day!!